Hello again!
Where have I been you ask? Well, to be honest, I have been hiding. Hiding from me. Hiding from you. Hiding from the world. I feel so alone in this. My struggle just isn't about weight. It is about a lot of things. My self image. My self worth. I want to do this but doing it alone is difficult and scary. So what do I do as I feel the loneliness creep in? I isolate myself. I do realize on some level that this makes no sense but yet I find myself repeating the pattern over and over. I am so afraid of failure that I don't try. I am so afraid of rejection that I don't allow anyone in. All these things contribute to my weight and health issues. I see them. I recognize them. The question is am I willing to do something about it? I know that I want to.
I did get up and walk today. Not long or far since Mother Nature has felt the need to rain on my parade this morning but I went. I knew that if I didn't that tomorrow it would be even easier to say "Not today".
To be honest, I don't know where I am at. I am so overwhelmed by the task at hand. But, I am still trying. I am still here.
Jen, your not alone in this, your never alone in this! I think you have just forgotten what your capable of! Believe in yourself like everyone around you does! Your family loves you and will be there for you! When you get knocked down you get back up! Your struggle may be overwhelming... if you let it be! You started this journey with a will to be healthier! And keep in mind if you never give up soon you'll conquer the task of becoming healthier too! Rome was not built in one day, and it wasn't built by one person either! If you surround yourself with loved ones who care about you, I bet you'll find it much easier to keep on track! Alone it can be hard, but with the support of loved ones and great friends who believe in you... well then you'll see just how capable you really are! The key thing to remember is that no matter what happens your never alone, there is always someone there watching out for you! Like me! Hope I helped! You can do it Jen! I believe in you! Good luck, and keep on track!!!
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Thank you very much Kature! I need that little pep talk.
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