Today is a gold star day!

Today has been a pretty good day so far. I walked 2.35 miles this morning with an average speed of 3.1 mph. I plan to repeat that this evening. I have also been doing step ups 5 min at a time. I also started to log my food today. So, all in all, I am being a good girl :) It is a start and a good one.

Today I discovered Chic-fil-a has a great salad option for me. I did the garden salad with grilled chicken and lite Italian dressing. I left off the crouton but did add the sunflower kernels for some texture. I had this and the small chicken noodle soup. So I am full and happy.

I got the Extra Dessert Delights Mint Chocolate Chip gum and it is pretty darn good! Keeping me from mindless munching.

I feel pretty good about the steps I am making. Every little bit is one step closer to the goal!

The New Start:Take 474842947

It seems that I have fallen off the planet again. Well, not really but I got lazy. I let excuses get in the way of progress and I was too ashamed to blog. I didn't want people to know that I was not doing well although, I know I wasn't fooling anyone. Let's face it. People can see that I was not losing weight. I just got discouraged. Again. It is a long hard road. I miss the days when I was thinner and losing weight was not so hard. There things about getting old that just really suck. This is one of them. With all that said, this has been a new week! I have been walking again and drinking my water. I am happy to say that although I have been lazy these last few months that I have not gained the weight back so at least it isn't like starting completely over. The cooler weather helps. I can get out and walk. I have been walking twice a day. My morning walk being the more intense walk and the evening the more relaxed walk. I also got a step board so that I can do that while I watch tv. I am trying not to think of how much I need to lose total but think about smaller goals. My current goal is to get 20 pounds off and then go from there. The big picture is still in my mind but can get overwhelming is I focus only on that for too long. One day at a time. One way or another. I will get there.

I am so grateful for the friends and family that are so supportive. I could not do this without them!

Birthday Wish

Today I am 38. I am not exactly where I had myself pictured but I cannot allow myself to get too dragged down by that. I can only look forward keeping the past only as a reminder to not go back. I am excited about the year ahead. I want to see real changes in my life. I feel optimistic and ready to tackle the upcoming challenges.

I can and will do this.

Workouts and Goals

I was quite excited yesterday that I could use my xbox/netflix streaming to get workout videos! I tried my hand at a dance workout and it did not take me very long to learn something. I am not a dancer! I have no grace and little flexibility in movements but I tried and did the best that I could. I have also ordered some dvds from Netflix and a few from the library. It will give me a variety and hopefully keep me interested in the workouts. I actually found myself to be itching to get up and keep moving.
Today I was thinking about my goals. I have a round number in my head that I would like to be but it really isn't about the numbers. It is more the way I want to feel.I hate trying on clothes. I hate buying clothes. Heck. I hate wearing clothes most of the time. I want that to change. I want to be able to feel good when I go try on clothes. I want to feel like when I enter a room that my size does not dominate the space. I try to keep a mental picture of my goals. To see the prize. One of these days it will be reality.

Chanting My Way to a New Me!

If you look at the wall beside my bed, the wall in my bathroom and on my fridge you will see a simple piece of paper with very simple words. These words have become my mantra, my motto, my daily pep talk and my self motivating chant. They simply say
"Are you going to be 40 AND FAT
or are you going to be
40 and FIT?"
When I feel the desire to not get up and walk or go do the Wii Fit or to go to the pool for water aerobics I ask myself this question. It usually does the trick.
This Sunday I will be 38. I have given myself two years to be fit. Not 2 years to lose the weight. I plan to be there well before then but 2 years for this to be my new way of life. Hitting the BIG 4-0 will be tough enough, I don't want to be there and still be like I am today. I also realize that after that 40 mark it gets even harder. So I have to make decisions today that will make that milestone happen.
Losing weight isn't just about being in a smaller dress it is about health.
I can feel my blood sugar is out of whack. I knew I was borderline diabetic and that I was in the extreme high risk group of getting diabetes (family history, gestational diabetes twice and a history of blood sugar problems) yet I put the thought on the back burner and had the attitude that if I pretended it wasn't there it wouldn't be. I remember watching my Granny and my Aunt Estee give themselves insulin shots daily. I saw my Granny's leg that had a sore that never healed. I don't ever remember her not having that bandage on her leg. Yet, somehow, I felt that it was still not something I needed to worry about. I am actually afraid to get screened right now because I am almost positive what the outcome would be.
Then there is the high blood pressure aspect. I have a strong family history of high blood pressure and strokes. I have been fortunate that I have escaped the high blood pressure in my life but really, how long will that hold out? There is only so long I can stand in the middle of a freeway and not get plowed by a bus!
Every day I have to be aware of my choices and how it will affect my tomorrow. It is a lot of pressure. Some days, I come out on top and some days I just fail but I keep on going. With the help of my friends and family, I will get there!

Back again!

Wow! I didn't realize that so much time has past since my last post. I have had a rough few weeks. I was down for over a month with m y back then depression set in and I lost my bearings. One thing about me though, is I won't stay down for long! So here I am back at it again. It is frustrating, however. It feels like I have been fighting with my weight for most of my life. When I was younger I fought with image issues and now it is weight and image issues. It is tiring. Sometimes I think I would be better off just having surgery but I don't really want to go that route. One, I cannot afford that and two my fear is that I will end up back where started if I don't work my way there. At what point though do I say that this obviously isn't working? I don't know. I just know that I refuse to give up.
I started working out on mom's Wii and swimming when I can get in the pool. It is just about to hot for walking outside so that limits what I can do. Sometimes I wish I was a happy morning person that could get up and just go walk at the crack of dawn or that it was safe to walk late at night when I have the urge to do so. Ahhh, so much wishing. I wonder if there are enough stars in the sky for all that.
Anyhow, I wanted all my friends to know that I am still working at it and to ask you not to give up on me yet.

Thanks to you all!

Being Plump IS NOT Pleasant!

I am not "pleasantly plump". There is nothing pleasant about this.
I am not "curvy". Curves would hint to having a shape other than round.
I am not "more to love". I am fat.
The government says that I am obese. A word I really do not like to hear in the same sentence as my name but it is out there for all the world to see. I cannot hide it but I can change it but to change I need to know where it started.

I find it funny the things we tell ourselves about gaining weight. We say "it is the freshman 10-15" when we start college. It is "the first year married 10-15"when we get married. It is "the extra baby weight"after the baby is born and it all adds up and one day you find yourself in the Fat Lady Store hoping to God to find something for Easter that doesn't resemble a tie-dyed tent. It didn't happen all at once but one pound by one evil pound. But the truth is (no matter what anyone tells you) it was a lot easier to put it on than to take it off. I have found my body to be much more agreeable to sitting on the couch and eating whatever crosses its lips than to working hard and eating right. My body needs to be whipped in to behaving. It wants to go on its own and do its own thing but I am forcing it do the contrary.

I walk every day. I try to eat right. I try to make healthier life long sustainable choices and what does my body do? It rebels. It refuses to give me any sign that my hard work is paying off. It refuses to shed even one measly pound to give me a shred of hope that my efforts are not in vain. Compliance is an issue here and I am serving notice that it is no longer acceptable. Now to get my physical state and my mental state on the same page.

Weight loss isn't just about a change in body but a change in mind. A change in behavior. I have to change the way I see myself. The way I see food and the way I see exercise. It is a lot to do and it can be overwhelming. Today, I am overwhelmed. Tomorrow, I will clear the slate and face another day. As I continue, one thing will catch up with the other. The fat lady hasn't sung yet and when she does it WONT BE ME!

E-Mealz update

Well, I have been using e-mealz.com for one full week and just bought the groceries for my next week. I thought I would update everyone one what I have thought so far. To be honest, I am not sure I am saving bundles on my grocery bill in terms of dollars spent. By the time I factor in breakfast items/ lunch items/ general household items and pet items I am spending roughly the same each week. HOWEVER, I am saving money. What I buy- gets used. Too many times I bought groceries with the intent of cooking some particular meal that never happened. Mainly because I would forger to take out the necessary frozen meat to defrost in time. So I am saving money there. I would often buy things and they would perish before I could get around to cooking with them. So I am saving money there. Plus because my week is planned I don't end up going out for fast food. So I am saving money there. In the last week, we had food outside the home once and that was for Chic-fil-A's grand opening by our house. So all in all, I am liking this!

As far as the meals. So far every meal has been a success. Some we even saved to do for lunches in the coming weeks. I didn't do a low fat plan or anything. I am just trying the regular meal plan. I still think that will be a good plan for us since the meals are balanced and fairly portion controlled. I may later go to the low fat plan but not at the moment. The meals are good and quick and easy.

Well, that is enough for my commercial but food is such an important aspect of losing weight that I would be negligent to not mention this find.

Water

I am still having problems with getting in my water. Really there is no excuse for this. I have a nifty water water bottle and when it is filled I DRINK IT! It is getting myself to step away from the diet Dr. pepper and filling up the water bottle that seems to get missed.

I did find some awesome water tricks though. I have tried most of these and I have to say for those that just do not like plain water this works!

First, start with COLD, purified water. Britta water filter is my best friend. Then add any of these combos. DRINK! I have to have ice in my water. It is a mental thing but it has to be there.

Slice lemon and a sprig of thyme
Slice lemon and a sprig of rosemary
Slice cucumber and bruised mint leaves
Slice orange and slice lime
Slice lime and bruised mint leaves
2 sliced strawberries and bruised mint leaves
Slice grapefruit and bruised /crushed lemongrass
Slice grapefruit and 1 sprig rosemary

The only one I have not tried is the lemongrass combo since I have found any lately.
I am going to make sure the water bottle is full and take it with me when I walk today.

Walking Through the Pain

Today is not a good day. My emotions are all over the place. I am so stressed about finances and taxes and just life in general. I know this affects my weight and I am trying to not let it get to me. I have not been letting myself do the same emotional eating that has gotten me in trouble in the past. I also walked. I even walked further than I normally do. I walked 2.31 miles. So I am working hard to not let the emotions of the day hinder my weight loss. It isn't easy though that is for sure.
Britt made me a playlist on my iPod of some good walking music and that did help. It helped my walk and it helped to clear my mind. I am still on target for walking 3 miles by the end of the month. I wont give up!

I do hope things get better though. I really could use some good news in my life.

Good Day

I have been doing good today with food. I think having e-mealz is really going to help. Just having a plan is helping me. I just need to work on the water. I was doing so good with get my water in but I got lazy. Each day that I get better at even one thing is a step in the right direction.

I went for my walk yesterday and I plan to walk in a few minutes. The weather is nice. I just take my ipod and get lost in my own head for a little while and it is nice. I plan to increase the distance this week. I would like to get up to 3 miles at a time by the end of April. One step at a time and I will be there.

Lovin the Sun

I made up for not walking this week in one day. I am sure it doesnt really work that way but I at least walked. We went to Kemah and Britt and I walked all over that place. I have the sunburn and leg pains to prove it. After this winter though it was worth it! I have come to terms with not getting in to the size I want by summer but Christmas is a very attainable goal. I must keep at it.

Just thinking.

My thought for the day: Here's to the future because I am done with the past! This is my current wallpaper on my iPod. It is my motivation for the week. Which of course has me thinking. Changing eating habits is a lot like trying to quit smoking or drugs. In fact, in some ways it is harder since food is still needed. It isn't just a matter of stopping. You still have to eat. It is changing your whole perception on food. And like quitting drugs or alcohol it is tough. You need a support system. You need a plan. You need to be prepared to fail and get back up.

This week my plan was to use my new menu and grocery list from e-mealz. I bought groceries this evening and am looking forward to staying on track this week. I plan to get back to walking and aside from any crazy weather, I have a week with no distractions from that goal.

I want to see the glass as half full instead of my normal half empty. Some people can just do this weight loss thing like it nothing more difficult than changing the channel on the tv. For me, it is hard work. I guess I need to change the channel in my head from the I can't to the I can channel. I do wish I had a bit more of a support group. That was the plus side to going to weight watchers. I could believe that all those people there were my support system. Power in numbers and all.

All over the place

I am finding the real world to be a bit of a problem. The fact is that in a perfect world I would be skinny. I would have time to do what I need to get done. I would have my pantry full of things I should have and they would all taste wonderful. However, I do not live in a perfect world. I am having another rough week. 2 of my days will be spent at the VA hospital taking care of my parents. Yesterday I left my house before 7 and didn't get home till almost 6. I then had to go to the store to get stuff to make dinner. I was exhausted. I did not walk. Tomorrow will be more of the same. I am hoping to get my walk in today but the sky seems to be looming over me just daring me to step outside so that it can dump a sea of rain upon my head. I am a person of habit. My routine is important to me and when things throw it off, I am unsettled. Yet, a sane and normal person would look at my life and see nothing but chaos. Trust me, there is a pattern to my chaos and I need it to be that. If only things would go as I want them to all the time. Not like that would ever happen but i could wish for it. I know I could go to my mom's and use the Wii but I feel so exposed. I am tense. I need things to be on my terms in my yard so to be speak. All of these things make this journey a wee bit harder. I am of course trying to change these things but one thing at a time.

2 month update

I have been on this journey now 2 months. So far I have lost right at 12 pounds. It isn't exactly where I wanted to be but it is heading in the right direction. I am happy that I am making some progress. I just need to keep the momentum alive!

I have noticed that I do better with a weekly menu. When left to wing it, I make wrong choices. With that said, as soon as have the money in the bank (it is on the way) I am going to sign up for e-mealz.com. Meredith told me about it and I am actually quite excited. It gives you dinner plans for the week with a grocery list and the savings. It looks really easy and I think it is something that will help a lot. It should help my wallet and my waistline at the same time and that is a really cool thing and it is only $5 a month!

This week I will be walking in the afternoons instead of the mornings. I have got to take my dad to the VA twice this week and that will make it difficult to walk in the morning but thats O.K. I enjoy the warm air and the sun of the afternoon. I wish I could run a bit but while my brain wants to run my body is quite disagreeable to the idea. Hopefully, as the weight comes off, that will change.

Today's question is "Will I be defeated or will I defeat this?"
Someone pointed out that I sounded defeated in my last post. To be honest, I felt it. I knew this would be a journey. I knew there would be up and downs. I just feel like right now there are more downs than ups. I don't want to be defeated. I want to be the victor.
I was flipping through the channels yesterday and some whack job infomercial guy caught my attention. Well, more like something he said. He basically said that eating is very much the same as balancing a check book. When you overeat you bankrupt your body and your mind. This for some reason really struck me. The cycle of overeating/bad food choices plus lack of activity has left me physically and mentally bankrupt. I have cheated myself of opportunities. I have chiseled away at my self-esteem and self-worth. I am working to breaking this cycle.

Today I am not defeated! Everyday is a new day to defeat this mess I have created. One day at time. One day I will look back on these moments and know that it was because of these times that I made it.

This week has not gone so well for walking. Yesterday, I was dealing with Britt and her toothache and dentist appointment and the day got away from me. I woke up this morning to rain. It just never ends. I still cannot find my workout dvds from when we moved in here. I hate to have to buy them again. Well, right now that isn't an option. I am rather frustrated right now. I am so tired of my weight being a battle. I am sick of all the distractions. It is so difficult when your income fluctuates as much as ours is right now. Simple things like keeping groceries on hand is taken for granted. I could go work on the Wii at mom's but I prefer to not have eye witness to such an attempt.

O.K. I will stop whining for now.

Its such a good feeling to know your alive

I woke up this morning with an awful pain in my back. I am not sure what that is all about but with this beautiful weather I was not about to pass up my morning walk. I need to be outside. The air feels so amazing. I just feel so alive out in the sun. I am going to try to get in an evening walk as well. I find it funny how a little thing like weather can so dramatically affect my mood and spirits. I guess I am just not cut out for dreary weather. Even if I love the sound of rain. I need sunshine. For me losing weight is so much easy this time of year. I hope the numbers reflect that in the coming weeks.

Hiding Places

Hello again!
Where have I been you ask? Well, to be honest, I have been hiding. Hiding from me. Hiding from you. Hiding from the world. I feel so alone in this. My struggle just isn't about weight. It is about a lot of things. My self image. My self worth. I want to do this but doing it alone is difficult and scary. So what do I do as I feel the loneliness creep in? I isolate myself. I do realize on some level that this makes no sense but yet I find myself repeating the pattern over and over. I am so afraid of failure that I don't try. I am so afraid of rejection that I don't allow anyone in. All these things contribute to my weight and health issues. I see them. I recognize them. The question is am I willing to do something about it? I know that I want to.

I did get up and walk today. Not long or far since Mother Nature has felt the need to rain on my parade this morning but I went. I knew that if I didn't that tomorrow it would be even easier to say "Not today".

To be honest, I don't know where I am at. I am so overwhelmed by the task at hand. But, I am still trying. I am still here.

9 down!

I am happy to say that despite being sick for a week and fighting with mother nature I am now down a total of 9 lbs! It is slow going but given the circumstances of the last we or so that is still a good thing. I am going to try to step it up this week though.

I have discovered that if I don't keep my water bottle with me at all times I don't drink water. I know this seems like a simple concept to the average human being but if I am in the kitchen making myself a glass of fluid you can bet it wont be water. Somehow my mind doesn't compute that water can be just as easily consumed from a glass as my water bottle. So now that I have figured out that this is how my brain works I know what to do. Keep water in the water bottle and keep it with me all day!! Save diet dr pepper for the glass!

We are going to Vegas in April/May and I have set a goal to be back in my cute skirts for this trip. It is doable. I just need to keep my eye on the prize!

Freezing and Sick

Hey, where have a I been? Oh, yeah. I was sick all week. Not that anyone has missed me or anything but it is hard to stay on the right track when I am not feeling up to do what needs to be done! am finally feeling somewhat better. Still congested a bit but up and moving. Unfortunately, it is too cold and wet to get any walking done! Hopefully by Monday I will be up and running full force and the weather will be more agreeable.

Until then I am just trying to keep my head above water.

Rain, Rain, Go Away!

I kind of fell off the wagon a bit last night. Not too bad really but still. We were late getting home from church so we stopped in at Jack- n - the box and I got my all time favorite, Sourdough Jack. It did not really push me too much over but you know what I discovered? That burger just really isn't worth the 710 calories! The one we made from the Biggest Loser Cookbook at 281 calories was WAY better! That Sourdough Jack really didn't even taste good to me at all! Now the tacos from Jack in the Box I am happy to say are still within my caloric budget! As for burgers I will stick to making my own! The taste is worth the hassle!

The weather is playing havoc on my walking. It is cold and rainy. I did walk Monday in the cold and rain but I don't think that really is a good idea to do several times in a week. I am ready for some warmer weather or at least some sunny days!

Whales for Christmas

It was so cold this morning when I walked but it was nice. I had my music playing and for a brief moment in time I was alone in my thoughts and free from all other cares in the world. My morning walks are a great time to think when I am by myself and to share ideas when I am walking with Britt. Either way, once I am out of bed, I really enjoy that time. Thanks in part to the chilly weather I was able to shave 17 minutes off my walk from the first day I made that route! Go me! Each day I feel myself getting a bit stronger. I feel I can increase the walk probably next Monday. I need to map out some new routes before then. I love SparkPeople for that reason. I can play around with the map and see what routes would be best for me.

This morning, I did a lot of thinking as to where I want to be. What goals I want to accomplish on this journey. Christmas always seems like such a rough time for me. Everyone wants lots of photos and I hate that. I hate seeing yet another year of me looking like Shamu. I want this year to be different. I want to be able to feel comfortable in my own skin when that flash of light permanently catches my essence on to film. And speaking of such... I have a goal of family photos this Summer. A friend of mine is going to do our photo shoot and she has been after me to get them done but then we are back to the Shamu thing so this Summer I want to be far enough along my weight loss journey to at least get a family photo. Then when I am at goal weight I can do it again!

I am going to move my weigh day to Saturday this week I think. I work in the nursery on Sunday morning with 3 of my biggest supporters so I am thinking reporting on Saturday instead of Monday will help me. The only problem is I have to use mom's scales. She doesn't mind or anything but I guess at some point I should have my own. I only weigh once a week though. I can't handle the stress of daily weighing. I don't see how mom takes that since your body fluctuates so much from day to day. To each their own I suppose.
Well, back to work. I have been bad about my water intake so I need to get back on that today! Progress one day at a time!

The Search for Me

After taking a few days away from my blog I am back. I just needs a couple of days for a gold ole down south pity party! I think most of that was my blood sugar was too low and my hormones are out of whack! Gotta love getting older.

I found out last night that someone actually reads my blog. A rather unexpected person at that. So a big thank you to Kature for your support. You are a good friend!

I weighed in this morning and I am down another 1.5 pounds for a total of 5.5! Not bad considering that I did not walk for 4 days in a row! I walked this morning though. Even though it was freezing cold AND raining! I didn't walk as far but I did walk and I walked at a steady pace.

I rediscovered an old recipe that I got awhile back for Cap'n Crunch Shake! OMG this stuff is amazing! I think I will make me one right now!

Now on to a great week! I promised Britt that once I lost 10 pounds we could have a pizza day! She is counting them down.

BLAH

I have had a rough day today. I just feel plain old blah. I wanted to eat everything in sight, at least I managed to not go too crazy but it didn't help my feelings none. I can't say was depressed but I just feel off. Hormonal or something. I feel like I need a good cry and a nice long trip in a hot tub. Tomorrow will be a better day.

Self Motivation 101

Today as I was on my walk I caught myself thinking about how far I really have to go on this journey. I kept thinking that even is I lose x this week I still have y to go...I began to get discouraged. I literally had to tell my self to stop! While gaining weight was a lot easier, faster and took much less brain effort; I did not get here over night. It will take time. It wont happen suddenly it is a journey and one that I am taking bit b bit and day by day. I had to give my self a little pep talk. Remind myself that I am making progress. Sometimes I feel really by myself in all this and others I remember that I do have friends and family that are there for me. I just need the patience to endure it all. I think I will go browse ModCloth for some more motivation!

Magic #4

I weighed in this morning. I have lost 4 pounds this week!! I am so happy. Can't you just see my happy dance? Step by step and day by day. I will get there!

Britt and I walked a little over 2.5 miles this morning. We have been doing good with our walks. I mapped out a better route though since they are working on the main road out here. I want to avoid walking around construction zones. Call me silly but being plowed by a bull dozer is not my idea of fun.

Until tomorrow my friends, have a blessed day!

Comme Si Comme Ca

I am not sure I did well today. I came in way under my calories. I did go walking although not as long as I wanted to or needed to. I also have been doing good with my water and all that too. So I guess all in all it was good just not the best.

Today, I made up the menu for the week and got the grocery list made up. I am trying all new recipes this week so this should be fun!

Now for some much needed sleep!

Feel the Burn!

Wow! Today has been a long day. Mark is out of town working so it is just me and Britt. Today we went to the zoo and the park. We walked and walked and walked some more. Then we came home and watched The Devil Wears Prada. After resting a bit we went and walked around Walmart for about an hour and got some socks, and something we can use to take a picnic lunch to the park. I have got my walk in today!! I can feel the burn in my legs but it is oddly a good feeling. We will be walking tomorrow at the Galleria and doing some dream shopping. Looking for some ideas for goal clothes and all that. Just overall being girly.

I am doing well food wise as well. Amazing. I don't feel deprived or anything. Britt has really been a big help to me.I don't think I could do this as well without her.

I have been trying a few different fruit and herb combos in my water. I like that a lot. Today was grapefruit and fresh mint. Mark really liked the cucumber slices and fresh mint yesterday. It makes for a nice and easy change in my water. I have found it helps to get those 8 glasses in this way.

Well, gotta get some rest for tomorrows walk-a-thon!

Consistency

I would like to start today by apologizing to anyone who might actually be reading this. I know most days will be very boring. My life is not the most exciting. However, I do need to write everyday. My problem has always been consistency. I lack it. In fact the only thing I am really consistent with is being inconsistent. I am hoping that if I force myself everyday to blog and face the events of my day it will keep me focused on staying on track. I don't want to repeat the patterns of the past. The 5 days good then blow it on the weekend and so forth. I need to make lasting changes. At this point I am not yet ready to publicly admit my starting weight but I will admit that I am the largest I have ever been in my entire life. I know that my self worth is not based on my external appearance and I want to state that is not my motivation. It is about health. I have a laundry list of family history of weight related health issues. I cannot guarantee a lot of things in regards to my health but I can lessen my chances of diabetes, high blood pressure, heart problems and a lot of other issues. I am also an influence in my daughter's life and I don't want her repeating my patterns as well. I just don't want people thinking I have some idea that my life will be better or that I will be a better person by getting my weight off. I would like to feel better about my appearance and all and I don't think that is an unhealthy desire.

Ok, I have blabbed enough for this morning. Now to face the day!

Latte FTW!

Another good day. I tried a new strat with my salad for dinner the last couple of days. I spread everything thing out on a plate instead of a bowl and really worked to make my salad look pretty as well as be healthy. I ate it slower and it filled me up so it helped. I also discovered that I can make myself a Chai Latte or Cappuccino Latte for a tad over 40 calories! That alone makes me happy. I am actually looking forward to weighing on Monday. I really hope that it reflects my efforts.

I have set a few mini goals for myself but my endgame goal is of course "The Little Black Dress" I want to walk in a room in that famous quintessential garment that will say "I've done it!" Gotta keep my mind on the prize! I refuse to be 40 AND fat! Stay focused!

Birthday

I am happy to report that despite today being birthday day, I came in just under my total calorie allowance! We went with cupcakes instead of a full cake so I was able to eat one and walk away! I really am proud of myself. I just hope that my efforts pay off. We shall see on Monday when I weigh again.

Thank you friends for helping me on this. I appreciate the love and support! It sure helps to not feel so alone on my journey.

I am Strong

I got up and walked this morning. To be honest I wanted to stay in bed. I ache everywhere from yesterday's walk but I knew I needed to do it. When I was walking last spring it hurt at first but it got better. So I am holding on to that. I will push through.

I will weigh in on Monday and post my progress. Hopefully it will be great news! I know I could use a good report to help me stay on target.

I got some motivational wallpapers for my ipod. I plan to switch them out every few days to help me out. Todays was "I am strong" and you know what, I am strong. I can do this. With God's help and the support of my family and friends, I can do this!

Day 1

So far today has gone well. I have stayed within my calories, I got in my water, veggies and dairy and I walked. The hardest thing today was measuring out the 2 T of Ranch dressing but once I mixed into my salad I realized that 2 T was really enough. Shocking, I know! Also, getting used to the increase in water intake has been fun. I have made more than my share if trips to the powder room today!

I am glad today has been good. I can usually take a day or so but it is staying consistent that is my problem. I will have to take this one day at a time and hopefully blogging will help. I have a long way to go but I need to think of it in smaller bits or else I will be overwhelmed. Whatever works right?

A Fresh Start

Ok, I have decided to make a blog. I don't imagine that many will read this but it is more for me anyhow. I need to be accountable for my weight loss goals. If, long the way, I motivate someone else, then all the better. I will try to write in my blog daily and update my weight loss weekly. I don't think I will post my beginning weight at first though. I just don't feel that brave yet but maybe later on down the road.

Here's to a new me!